How much of an issue, is reduced flexibility for men? I am very uncomfortable doing the missionary position, and I’ve seen that this is what men first try.

Answer:

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http://www.tantraheaven.com/  - "Where Body and Soul meet". 

 World class workshops in tantra with  Mare Simone a Certified Tantra Educator.

4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Al Link and Pala Copeland

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4ppl Online Dating Personals

Online personals site created for people - simple, effective, and FREE.

4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Al Link and Pala Copeland

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Have available an interesting assortment of perfumes (for men and women)—some with pheromones added, creams and lotions, essential oils, massage oils, edible lubricants, as well as oil, water and silicone lubricants. Apply them while your lover watches or apply them to each other.

Excerpted from our Tantra and Kama Sutra Sex Positions eBook.

4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

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Tantric Sex For Beginners: The YabYum Position

Watch this video to learn to use breath and visualization to help you move and share your sexual energy in the Tantric YabYum position.

This video was created by Pala Copeland and Al Link of  4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

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One day, Jesus wakes up in a bad mood. He is feeling depressed and lethargic. In fact, a typical Monday-morning feeling. He wanders around heaven looking for someone to cheer him up and finally arrives at the Pearly Gates where Saint Peter is interviewing the new arrivals. Suddenly he sees an old man with a long white beard whose face looks familiar. He goes up to him. "Excuse me sir,” says Jesus, “but your face seems familiar. I am sure we have met. What did you do on earth?” The old man smiles. “As a matter of fact,” he says, “I am a carpenter and lived a full and happy life until my son left home and became world famous. I never saw him again.” Jesus looks at him with astonishment and says with delight, “Dad!” The old man opens his eyes wide and rushes forward with outstretched arms, crying, “Pinocchio!”

4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Al Link and Pala Copeland

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Classic Love Texts and Modern Practices II

During the 19th century Tantric writings were introduced to the west by British scholars and travelers, foremost among them Sir Richard Burton, translator of three classic texts that explain and illustrate the art of love with considerable emphasis on sexual lovemaking positions: the Kama Sutra and Ananga Ranga from India and the Perfumed Garden from Arabia. Not surprising given the surface prudery of the time, these works were greeted with a largely hostile reception. Tantric practices were condemned as “orgiastic rites too terrible for civilized men to hear”.

 Today, despite our more open attitudes to sexuality, much of this cult-like perception of Tantra persists. Partly this may be due to traditional Tantra’s highly ritualized religious aspects – worship and identification with particular gods and goddesses, and mystical signs, symbols and chanting.

But perhaps an even bigger block is the absolute necessity of retaining your aroused sexual energy internally and the accompanying emphasis for men on not ejaculating. This directly challenges our culture’s sexual ideal of simultaneous genital orgasm. The practice of arresting your sexual fever and turning it in and upward rather than allowing it to flow out and down may seem abnormal and contrived; going against the laws of nature and our bodies. After all, the powerful release of a “regular” orgasm feels so very good; why should anyone voluntarily pass this by for the promise of unknown ecstasy? 

 However, a gradual shift away from a strong focus on semen retention to a slower approach of gently learning to move all that wild sexual energy around inside you, is part of the new sacred sex (or neo-Tantra) that’s been emerging in the last 20 years. Whole body orgasm, through eyes, elbows or toes, becomes a real possibility, not just our venerated Big O of the genitals. While learning to withhold ejaculation is part of the process there’s also a more relaxed, more fluid perspective that allows for personal preference and ability. You can take your time learning the delights that come with delaying or eliminating ejaculation as you explore the many other ingredients of sacred sex practice – emotional and mental as well as physical.

 Neo-tantra begins with much from her traditional parent – for example, the precept that sexual union can lead to transcendence, and specific techniques of breath and muscle control – and adds an assortment of other goodies. Jungian concepts, Reichian bodywork, acupressure, aromatherapy, creative visualization and dynamic meditation can all be part of the loose and joyous eclectic meld. The essential approach is spiritual, meaning non-religious and non-dogmatic. And playfulness is woven into the fabric of loving – laughter and lust come hand in hand to the true lovers’ bed.

Al Link and Pala Copeland - 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

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Classic Texts and Modern Practices

 The term “sacred sex” may seem somewhat of an oxymoron in western society, a contradiction in terms. Suggesting that you can find your way to God through sexual activity has been a bit like suggesting you can eat your way to thin-ness. Partaking in wildly passionate sex and seeking an intensely spiritual life just haven’t been part of the same curriculum. We’ve been taught that pursuing sexual pleasure, enjoyable as that may be, is at best hedonistic and at worst damaging for our souls. To be a highly spiritual person is to be essentially sexless. It’s an either / or situation.

 But that view is changing. The concept of sacred sex, finding spiritual union through a sexual one, is slowly gaining ground in North America. Our psyches are certainly ripe for it. As a society we’re obsessed with sex. In part it’s a lustily healthful obsession, a celebratory dance of life’s great force, but much of it flounders in darkness and neurosis – sex for power, sex for profit, sex for oblivion. We use and abuse sex for everything from selling soap to making or breaking political leaders.

 At the same time there’s a spiritual hunger running rampant through the land. The ache for meaning stretches from radical through traditional—from new age spiritual to long-established religious, from pagan to fundamentalist. We’re all screaming for substance.

 Well why not unite the two? Bring sex and spirit together and find your magic! The idea’s definitely not a new one. Ritualized sex has been an acknowledged sacred pathway in Eastern philosophies for several thousand years. Tantra, probably the most commonly known form of sacred sexuality, has its home in branches of the Hindu and Buddhist cultures of India and Tibet. Based on a belief that the union of male and female principles (yin and yang, yab and yum) will lead to enlightenment, traditional Tantra uses a complex series of sounds, visualizations, breath control, and sexual positions combined with prayerful thought to reach the heights of godly bliss.

Think about it. Doesn't this make sense? Aren' you a bit currious to explore these ideas and practices a bit more?

Al Link and Pala Copeland - 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

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A or B Game

Try two different versions of a sexual technique—for example two different tongue strokes in oral sex, two different thrusting maneuvers during intercourse, two different caresses on back or thighs, two different kisses. Refer to one as A and one as B. Ask which (s)he likes best. This opens you up to all sorts of new pleasures and avoids any hurt you might feel when someone tells you they do not like something. Repeat as often as wanted to learn each other’s arousal and orgasmic responses. You can use this technique during any lovemaking, but we suggest you set aside times when your intention is not to progress in your lovemaking to orgasm, but rather your intention is only to learn about each other. This removes any performance anxiety and can really be lots of fun if you keep it very light and playful. Repeat this as a learning exercise at least three or four times per year, or more if you discover that you both really like it.

Al Link and Pala Copeland

4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Popularity: 3% [?]

How to Be Here Now - Or - Love Buttons, Go Ahead And Push Some!

 Success with Tantra lovemaking requires that you go out of your mind and get into your body. This means getting out of thought and into sensation.

 Here is an incredibly easy but powerfully effective way to rapidly improve the quality of your experience during lovemaking, by helping you get out of memory and get into the Now Moment. With this simple technique, we call the dial technique, men can learn to delay ejaculation, women can learn to have multiple orgasms, you can overcome feelings of embarrassment, shame and guilt, win over fear, worry and boredom, you can keep passion and excitement alive in your relationship forever, and you can have lots more fun with your lover.

 One form thought takes is memory. Memory is very useful for lots of things, but during lovemaking it can also be a problem. You must learn to differentiate between what kind of memory is helpful and what kind is not helpful. Your body remembering how to do things, for example - keeping internal smooth muscles relaxed during peaks of sexual arousal, is very helpful, because this kind of memory does not mimic thought. But if your memory mimics thought it will put you into your head and keep you out of your body. One of the most pernicious types of memory is the memory of your lover's body, or the memory of how lovemaking has previously progressed step-by-step, as a pattern that you then repeat over and over.

 Here is a technique that lovers can use to help them go out of their minds and get into their bodies. It is the dial technique. You can find all sorts of interesting variations for using this technique in other areas of your life besides lovemaking. This technique is very simple to use. To apply this technique you simply create in your imagination one dial for whatever you want to diminish and/or another dial for whatever you want to increase.

 In your imagination, create one dial that controls your memory (the kind of memory that mimics thought, e.g., remembering how something was the last time you did it), and create another dial that controls sensation. Make the dials different colors, for example the memory dial can be blue (symbolic of thought) and the sensation dial can be red (symbolic for the body). Any colors that feel right for you will work. You can also put textures, and other personalized touches to your dials. For example you could cover them with pieces of cloth that you are fond of. You can make the buttons different sizes if you want. For example you might want the sensation dial (or the things you want to increase in intensity) really big and the memory dial (or the things you want to decrease in intensity) really small.

 During your lovemaking, find the dials in your imagination and turn the dial for memory way down in intensity, strength, volume, or voltage to nothing at all. At the same time turn the sensation dial way up in intensity, strength, volume, or voltage to a very high level - a level that you are comfortable with. Turning the dials up or down simply means, in your imagination see your hand actually grab the button and turn it. You could also visualize a pointer on a dial screen increasing or decreasing, or the lights on a digital light meter, such as the indicators of a stereo signal on an amplifier, increasing or decreasing as you turn the button. Use any aid to visualization that works for you to show increase or decrease in intensity.

 Be creative in your use of this technique. Here are a few other suggestions for using the dial technique during lovemaking. Create buttons for any aspect of your lovemaking that you are unhappy with, such as fear, quick male ejaculation response, worry, guilt, shame, or embarrassment Create other buttons for any skill, knowledge or feeling that you want to be more present in your lovemaking, such as love, general relaxation response, internal smooth muscle relaxation, firmness of erection, female orgasm response, female ejaculation orgasm response, excitement, joy, fun, playfulness, creativity, or comfort

 If you create a lot of buttons be aware of getting yourself confused. It may be wise to use only a few buttons at a time. You might also record the buttons on paper. Draw pictures of the buttons and clearly label them so later you can remember which buttons are for which experiences. Drawing the buttons can also help you more easily visualize them in your imagination.

 Once you have learned how to use this technique you will find that every time you make love is like the first time! You will feel that thrill, that excitement, that anticipation, that longing for your lover that you felt the first time you made love with them. In fact it is the first time, because you are not invoking thought/memory to compare it with. This is delightful indeed, and is one of the secrets to staying in love and keeping passion alive in a relationship that lasts a lifetime. This is a key skill necessary to enable you to create love year after year with the same person. This is one important way to keep a monogamous committed relationship hot, sexy, juicy and exciting - indefinitely! Do you use the dial technique? Don't you wish your lover did?

Al Link and Pala Copeland

4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Popularity: 3% [?]