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Taoist Lovemaking Secrets

Al Link — Thu, 24 Feb 2011 04:55:38 +0000

This video shows you the basic techniques on Taoist lovemaking such as: Breathing Technique, the importance of foreplay in lovemaking and how to control ejaculation.

Inez Bracy interviews Al Link and Pala Copeland

Al Link — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 12:01:46 +0000

Living Smart and Well: Tapping into Your Feminine Energy

Inez Bracy interviews Al Link and Pala Copeland who have been practicing Tantric and Taoist sacred sex since 1987. Since 1997 their full time occupation is hosting sacred sex and relationships workshops and writing about these subjects for books, magazines, and the internet.

Love and Sex can go together

Al Link — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 03:14:05 +0000

Of course love and sex can go together, but not just any kind of sex at all; only a loving, respectful, mature, informed, knowledgeable, and skillful sexuality is a divine sexuality.

In other words there is some learning required if you are to advance or graduate from simple animal friction sex to energy sex and soul sex.

We suggest that sex is good for three reasons. First it will bring you pleasure and that is good. Second, sex actually has moral force when it is an expression of love between two people. Finally sex that becomes a meditation shared by the lovers awakens them to the direct personal experience of the divine within; a direct experience of God-consciousness or enlightenment.

The moment of illumination typically progresses from an experience of union between the lovers, to a shattering of all ego boundaries with the awakening to the direct experience that everything is one thing, and you are it; and that one thing is consciousness, not stuff.

You are not your body, you occupy a body. At the moment of illumination you realize your oneness with all and everything. When I am in that place of oneness and my beloved is in that place of oneness, there is only one of us.

Al Link and Pala Copeland

Sexy Spiritual Relationships

Heart Opening Eye Gaze Meditation

Al Link — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 02:46:27 +0000

Heart Opening Eye Gaze Meditation
By Al Link and Pala Copeland

Time: 2 minutes per day, every day you are together.

Lovers sit facing each other. For one minute, the first partner sends a look of love, using only the face and eyes to send the love, but not speaking any words. Later in the day or evening, the other lover sends a look of love in this same way. The partner receiving the look also remains silent.

Notes and Comments

This can be quite emotionally uncomfortable for some people, but we assure you that it becomes easy. In fact it becomes so profoundly moving, that you will become addicted to this simple exchange of love. This is a situation in which we encourage you to persist with the practice in spite of any emotional discomfort. Act to support what you want to create instead of acting to return to your emotional comfort zone as quickly as possible.

This eye gazing can result in a profoundly moving experience of emotional, energetic and spiritual connection between the lovers, especially if you are already at a peak of sexual arousal during lovemaking when you do it. However, don’t save this practice only as an accompaniment to lovemaking.

Take 2 minutes to send and receive love in this way every day you are together for the rest of your lives.

Some couples go weeks or months at a time without making this simple, yet profound connection. Making this connection every day cumulatively can transform your relationship and sustain you on a secure platform of love through any of life’s trials and tribulations.

We have found this simple practice to be the quickest surest and easiest way to open our hearts to feel love. Most of the times we look at each other in this way, when our hearts crack open, tears come to our eyes as the intense emotional feelings cause us to cry with happiness. Make no mistake, you don’t get your heart open once and for all and keep it that way. Your heart will close repeatedly, thus it must be re-opened over and over and over again. This simple practice will open your heart almost instantly.

How to Look

Gazing into each other’s eyes is not a staring contest. You will look in a particular way.

Have you ever been in a place with an absence of light? Near where we live there are some caves. Once inside these caves, there is a complete absence of light. Without light you can’t see anything. Just closing your eyelids can give you some sense of this experience, especially if you are in a dark room during the evening.

Close your eyes now. Now open your eyes, and notice how the light comes in. You don’t have to do anything for the light to come in. This is important to notice. Next, notice how you look at things, usually including your lover. You grab things with your eyes. Grabbing things means you isolate each thing and visually separate each thing from all other things. This is how you identify what something is. You must isolate it from everything else, and then you can name it, and when you name it you know it. You have grabbed it.

Looking with your eyes in this way is useful and necessary, but it is not the only way to look. Looking in this way actually sustains the perception (really an illusion) that everything is separate from everything else. This is dualistic consciousness. Dualism simply means separating one thing from another thing.

But there is another way to look, and that is like when you open your eyelids the light just comes in, without any effort or trying on your part. In this eye gazing exercise you will look in just this way, allowing the light to carry images into your field of vision, but you make no attempt to separate anything from anything else, and no attempt to name anything you see. Pay particular attention to the peripheral vision, not just the center of your field of vision where your lover is positioned. You don’t grab anything with your eyes; you simply allow the light to carry a single whole image into your awareness.

Al Link and Pala Copeland

Sexy Spiritual Relationships

Tantric Sex For Beginners: The YabYum Position

Al Link — Wed, 29 Aug 2007 17:36:35 +0000

Watch this video to learn to use breath and visualization to help you move and share your sexual energy in the Tantric YabYum position.

This video was created by Pala Copeland and Al Link of 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Sexual Energy Grounding Exercise

Al Link — Wed, 18 Jul 2007 15:58:53 +0000

Sexual Energy Grounding Exercise

Grounding is a very effective process for calming and stabilizing. Grounding connects you with the earth, carrying overpowering negative energies down and away much like a lightning rod. There are many methods for grounding. Try this one daily, as often as you think of it. Even if you don’t “feel” anything while you are doing it notice the difference grounding makes to your overall sense of well-being. Grounding is also an excellent practice whenever you are feeling sexually “wound-up”:

Sitting or standing, with your body relaxed, take a slow breath in through your nose.
Gently exhale through your mouth.
Focus your attention on the top of your head (your crown chakra).
Picture a funnel on the top of your head through which vital energy from the cosmos flows into your body—this is powerful, masculine, active energy.
As this sun and sky energy travels down through your body it gives you strength and vitality.
As it passes it also gathers up any negative energies you may be feeling—anger, lethargy, hyperactivity, grief, anxiety, fear.
Now focus your attention on your genitals (your root chakra) and picture a funnel there—with the small end of the funnel inside your body and the mouth of the funnel pointing down to the earth.
Allow the energy to flow through your lower funnel, away and down into the center of Mother Earth, taking with it all your tension; leaving vigor and calm in its wake.
Continue to visualize energy flowing in through your head, down through your body and out into the earth—bringing vitality and serenity and taking away stress.
Do this for a minimum of 3 minutes at a time.

Excerpted from our book Soul Sex: Tantra for Two

4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Al Link and Pala Copeland

Tantra Sacred Spiritual Sex

Al Link — Fri, 04 May 2007 07:00:51 +0000

Tantra Sacred Spiritual Sex

Sacred sex goes far beyond the bedroom, helping partners open fully to each other in trust and love through all facets of their relationship. Your relationship itself becomes a vehicle for spiritual growth and personal awareness. As you learn to open to yourself, to your own inner lover, you naturally open to others around you. You begin to understand that surrender does not mean submission or loss of self, but rather a loving expansion to something that is much greater than you are.

Like most spiritual paths, sacred sex teaches a discipline of the mind and body. It does so in a context of celebration and letting go into the sensual aspects of living, so that sacred sex is a paradoxical combination of mastery and spontaneity. As a celebration of life, sacred sex teaches the importance of conscious awareness, of being totally “in” your actions. By focusing attention on your body and your mind, and what you’re doing with them, you become all around healthier. Your emotions become more stable and more real. Your mental capacity increases and your physical health improves as you discover that your body is indeed the temple of your soul.

Balancing Feminine (Yin) and Masculine (Yang)

In both Taoist (China) and Tantric (India) traditions there are two opposite yet complementary forces at play in the universe, what the Taoists call Yin and Yang. Yin represents the feminine: cool, receptive, moist, and nourishing. Yang represents the masculine: active, dry, and fiery. Women are mostly yin, men are mostly yang—what popular author John Grey calls Venus and Mars—but within each woman there is some masculine energy and within each man some feminine. Carl Jung called these forces animus and anima. In Tantric lovemaking, you share and thus strengthen and balance your masculine and feminine energies. The YabYum posture, is an extraordinarily effective, and pleasurable, position for exchanging and balancing sexual energy with your lover, as is the Lovers’ Scissors.

Al Link and Pala Copeland – 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Classic Love Texts and Modern Practices II

Al Link — Wed, 02 May 2007 07:00:16 +0000

Classic Love Texts and Modern Practices II

During the 19th century Tantric writings were introduced to the west by British scholars and travelers, foremost among them Sir Richard Burton, translator of three classic texts that explain and illustrate the art of love with considerable emphasis on sexual lovemaking positions: the Kama Sutra and Ananga Ranga from India and the Perfumed Garden from Arabia. Not surprising given the surface prudery of the time, these works were greeted with a largely hostile reception. Tantric practices were condemned as “orgiastic rites too terrible for civilized men to hear”.

Today, despite our more open attitudes to sexuality, much of this cult-like perception of Tantra persists. Partly this may be due to traditional Tantra’s highly ritualized religious aspects – worship and identification with particular gods and goddesses, and mystical signs, symbols and chanting.

But perhaps an even bigger block is the absolute necessity of retaining your aroused sexual energy internally and the accompanying emphasis for men on not ejaculating. This directly challenges our culture’s sexual ideal of simultaneous genital orgasm. The practice of arresting your sexual fever and turning it in and upward rather than allowing it to flow out and down may seem abnormal and contrived; going against the laws of nature and our bodies. After all, the powerful release of a “regular” orgasm feels so very good; why should anyone voluntarily pass this by for the promise of unknown ecstasy?

However, a gradual shift away from a strong focus on semen retention to a slower approach of gently learning to move all that wild sexual energy around inside you, is part of the new sacred sex (or neo-Tantra) that’s been emerging in the last 20 years. Whole body orgasm, through eyes, elbows or toes, becomes a real possibility, not just our venerated Big O of the genitals. While learning to withhold ejaculation is part of the process there’s also a more relaxed, more fluid perspective that allows for personal preference and ability. You can take your time learning the delights that come with delaying or eliminating ejaculation as you explore the many other ingredients of sacred sex practice – emotional and mental as well as physical.

Neo-tantra begins with much from her traditional parent – for example, the precept that sexual union can lead to transcendence, and specific techniques of breath and muscle control – and adds an assortment of other goodies. Jungian concepts, Reichian bodywork, acupressure, aromatherapy, creative visualization and dynamic meditation can all be part of the loose and joyous eclectic meld. The essential approach is spiritual, meaning non-religious and non-dogmatic. And playfulness is woven into the fabric of loving – laughter and lust come hand in hand to the true lovers’ bed.

Al Link and Pala Copeland – 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Classic Love Texts and Modern Practices

Al Link — Mon, 30 Apr 2007 07:00:16 +0000

Classic Texts and Modern Practices

The term “sacred sex” may seem somewhat of an oxymoron in western society, a contradiction in terms. Suggesting that you can find your way to God through sexual activity has been a bit like suggesting you can eat your way to thin-ness. Partaking in wildly passionate sex and seeking an intensely spiritual life just haven’t been part of the same curriculum. We’ve been taught that pursuing sexual pleasure, enjoyable as that may be, is at best hedonistic and at worst damaging for our souls. To be a highly spiritual person is to be essentially sexless. It’s an either / or situation.

But that view is changing. The concept of sacred sex, finding spiritual union through a sexual one, is slowly gaining ground in North America. Our psyches are certainly ripe for it. As a society we’re obsessed with sex. In part it’s a lustily healthful obsession, a celebratory dance of life’s great force, but much of it flounders in darkness and neurosis – sex for power, sex for profit, sex for oblivion. We use and abuse sex for everything from selling soap to making or breaking political leaders.

At the same time there’s a spiritual hunger running rampant through the land. The ache for meaning stretches from radical through traditional—from new age spiritual to long-established religious, from pagan to fundamentalist. We’re all screaming for substance.

Well why not unite the two? Bring sex and spirit together and find your magic! The idea’s definitely not a new one. Ritualized sex has been an acknowledged sacred pathway in Eastern philosophies for several thousand years. Tantra, probably the most commonly known form of sacred sexuality, has its home in branches of the Hindu and Buddhist cultures of India and Tibet. Based on a belief that the union of male and female principles (yin and yang, yab and yum) will lead to enlightenment, traditional Tantra uses a complex series of sounds, visualizations, breath control, and sexual positions combined with prayerful thought to reach the heights of godly bliss.

Think about it. Doesn’t this make sense? Aren’ you a bit currious to explore these ideas and practices a bit more?

Al Link and Pala Copeland – 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra

Exercise – The A or B Game

Al Link — Sun, 15 Apr 2007 07:00:22 +0000

A or B Game

Try two different versions of a sexual technique—for example two different tongue strokes in oral sex, two different thrusting maneuvers during intercourse, two different caresses on back or thighs, two different kisses. Refer to one as A and one as B. Ask which (s)he likes best. This opens you up to all sorts of new pleasures and avoids any hurt you might feel when someone tells you they do not like something. Repeat as often as wanted to learn each other’s arousal and orgasmic responses. You can use this technique during any lovemaking, but we suggest you set aside times when your intention is not to progress in your lovemaking to orgasm, but rather your intention is only to learn about each other. This removes any performance anxiety and can really be lots of fun if you keep it very light and playful. Repeat this as a learning exercise at least three or four times per year, or more if you discover that you both really like it.

Al Link and Pala Copeland

4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra