I always fantasize about him and me having sex

I am married for 16 years and the sex is few and far between. The problem is that I know this guy and I always fantasize about him and me having sex. It feels like we have a connection. He is like a school boy and I a schoolgirl. I don’t want to hurt my family. My daughter is married and gone. My husband is gone all week driving a truck and only home 36 hours and then gone again. What should i do? We both have talked about having a romance and sex with no strings attached. With my husband it is so boring at times.

ANSWER

I could not advise you to start an affair, but here are some considerations. Affairs almost always become known and this means your husband and daughter will almost certainly eventually find out. Consider what will happen when the affair comes to the attention of your husband and daughter. If all you do is think about and imagine how wonderful it will be to have “non-attached” sex, and no one ever finds out, naturally this will seem like an irresistible temptation, but if you also realistically consider the consequences to your marriage if you husband discovers the affair, it may appear in a very different light.

It is a good idea to talk with your husband before you start the affair in order to clarify each other’s needs and wants sexually, time spent together, fidelity, etc., I have never seen open marriage work, but the best chance you have of making multiple sexual partners work is if both you and your husband agree to such an experiment, and then do so only with the other’s knowledge.

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